3:49pm I feel hopeless
I put $10 more dollars into HardRockBet and lost it all down to $0.07. This leaves my PayPal account at like $25 dollars.
I feel so beyond depressed right now, I was ahead, but now I'm not. I hate myself so deeply for this.
The serious loss chasing began like this today, I was watching a video of this boy who worked at Nintendo but got scammed by this girl and he lost his job so he played poker to try and win back some money, turn $300 into $1,000, but he ended up losing.
At the same time I was playing plinko with play coins in play mode to level up my vip status with GC coins.
At Winbonanza you can level up to VIP, and I noticed that my status decreased, so I played with a lot of gold play coins to level up. I went through like half a billion play coins and so far I'm like 4 million vip points still from my goal.
Once that goal is reached, I'd earn $500 dollars.
I lost all my fake money coins, but I knew that I can level up fast if I used real money coins, so I decided to cancel $50 from my $351 redemption request and play with it to try and level up. I turned the $50 into like $90, but lost it, so I cancled my $300 and lost that as well, and that was the beginning of the end.
The sad part is, I didn't even reach my final vip goal in the end.
Now I feel so sad, I feel like everyone is mad at me and hates me.
Also, some hours ago when I lost like $60 or $100 at HardRockBet, I got an automated phone call from my job encouraging me to add hours today.
I was off today, and I just lost hundreds of dollars that I worked and waited ages for, so that call really annoyed me.
I feel so irritated and depressed right now, why does this keep happening, I always have a plan to scale my money, but then I deviate from Plinko and go to slots, the slots make me win faster, so I play them, but then I end up losing my entire balance.
I hare this, I'm losing so much money and time with this stuff. I just want consistent and stable income and my job doesn't provide that, gambling gives me false hope, social media stopped paying out by a lot and these online surveys have been ghosting me.
I hate my life! I just want to end this all!
Please call 988 if you feel the same.
Thanks for reading.
4:05pm.
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