MintCoaTea

In a desperate move, I brought a $12.50 coin pack from Spree Casino for $9.99, and I lost it all in no time. I think Spree is rigged, this particular Casino always triggers my huge loss chases and losing sprees. F them. The $9.99 came out of my $40 Chine loan. Now I have about a dollar left. The other $28.88 something went to McDonaldz, I treated my siblings and I to McDonaldz earlier, but unfortunately the nuggets were less than satisfactory, and I brought 40 of them, a lot went to waste, and I still feel nauseous. I hate my life. Also, I tried to get at a $2,000 loan to pay off the storage, but I've failed, I got approved for a $5K loan, but needed a co-signer, I asked my farther but unfortunately it didn't work. I thanked him and he thanked me for trying. Also, my brother told me not to sell my phone because I need it, and he let me know that we were approved for benefits, so I thanked him. He also hugged me, so that was nice. Thanks for reading. ...

So my brother was asking me if I was ready to make the payment for the $780 storage unit. He told me that my 2nd eldest sister is willing to help. He asked how much I have, I was like maybe about $100... I then explained that I lost my momey from scams. I wish that my sister agreed to help me pay earlier because it could have been done,  but instead I had too much pressure on me, and I tried to make more money and I got scammed. He's like, I'll let her know. I saw him by the door with the door open with his hand in his face obviously upset. I apologized and explained that it was too much pressure, I was facing hundreds of dollars in bills. Anyway, I feel so beyond guilty right now. I feel like killing myself and stuff. [Call 988 if you feel the same]. Anyway, I'll try to sell my new phone at least, I also tried taking out loans earlier today. Gosh, I was ahead. I remember on the 12th of May at church after we were picking out clothes for my Mom's funeral, I received $12...

I had a dream that my Mom was successfully revived because I didn't give up on her. We then went to the mall and she sang my name for a Christmas card. I also got bit by a spider in my dream, but I didn't care because I was with my Mom again. My 2nd dream after that, my Mom was in the ICU room and my siblings and I had to step out because the doctor had to run tests, just like what happened last month.. I have a good dream about my Mom, then my mind pivots back to what happened to her in reality. What is this? -- I slept for countless hours because I wanted to have another dream about my Mom after the good mall dream. Sometimes, I just want to live in a sleeping state, but I guess I can't do that. You know after the depression comes the obsession. My OCD has reached a new level quite possibly. Thanks for reading.

[Last post for the night, I'm sorry but I just looked too cute in this cap, so I had to take a snap.] Anyway, Maybe the reason that so many bad things are happening to me could be something out there trying to harden my soul spiritually for the inevitable War of biblical portion! Maybe the war is psychological, perhaps the key to saving me and my family lies within... Me... If I can get my stuff together and sorted out, I can be so, so powerful, you know, maybe the next Beyoncé? Or TayTay?  Or maybe even better, an OG, 100% ME, but still powerful though like my idols.  I don't know, it's 11:07pm at night and I'm still grief stricken after losing my Mommy and I'm ired, tired, tired, but that's just it, Mommy never wanted me to give up in times of adversity, so I'll continue to be strong and fulfill a legacy ♡  Thank you for reading, truly.  11:09pm. #transgirl #cutetrans #cosplaygirl #gothgirl #transwoman 11:11pm 11:14pm

I'm sad that my (Vag) has a scar, I just noticed today. As if I wasn't going through enough already, now my kitty has a 1/³ inch scar ): I hope it wasn't from when I was shaving the other day, I hate Amazon E-Razors ]:  Life is going down hill so fast. Maybe lazor treatment can reduce the scar? I do hope so. I do hope so.  Also, I think I'm going to sell my new phone to try and pay off yhe $800 storage bill, because if I lose my and family's stuff, I'll definitely go permanently insane, and that scars me so much.  I actually could have paid the storage off if I didn't try to make more money with the money I've won already from gambling, I had at least $1000 just days ago, but hundreds in bills to be paid, $800 storage, $300 pawn. My older sister who was employed didn't want to help pay at the time for the family storage unit and stuff, so then I knew that it was all up to me to fix the problem. I thought that I could try to make more money by playing...

I accidentally scratched myself when thinking of a scenario of being in the mental hospital and my brother calling me with "I'm very sorry, Alan". As he explains that we lost the storage. I then scream, Nooo!!! Then kill myself. Then the mental hospital staff calls my brother to inform him about my death. While thinking of that stuff, I then accidentally scratched my hand, och. Thanks for reading. And please call 988 if you too feel like all hope is gone. Thank you.