I lost another $20

12:15pm.

I lost another $20 dollars, that's it of my TikTok paycheck, all $85 gone, and I wasn't even able to buy anything for my 2nd youngest sisters birthday today like I had hoped for, I just tried to make my losses back and hopefully make enough to pay for the hotel and pay for the birthday today, but instead I ended up losing it all and I feel like losing my life.

The moment I was making this last deposit I thought to myself "I'm sorry [ birthday sister's name]".

The I played wanted dead or a wild by hacksaw gaming in hopes of making like big money like those people who claim they've had, but in the end I just ended up losing it all.

This really sucks because I was really looking forward to this money so I can buy my sister a cake and gifts and stuff, but was also fixated on my losses and trying to make enough money foe the week, but in the end I just lost it all.

I wanted to save at least $30 out of the $85, but I failed in that too.

The losss chasing is just so severe.

What really aggravates me is yesterday night, I only had like $2 more dollars to make to withdraw my earnings on Megabonanza and yet I just ended up losing the $73, I just needed to make it to bloody $75!

Megabonanza couldn't even refund me the $49.99 last night, so I filled a dispute with PayPal, which I would lose.

This is total nonsense, my mind is like hurting right now. Also, I hurt underneath my right thumb nail when I was aggressively zipping back the red bag which contained my Estradiol and stuff, that was before I lost the $20.

Speaking of the $20, the moment I made the deposit I knew I've already lost the money.

F this world, F this life.

One of the only things that makes my life worth it right now would have to be my family.

Like, no one else in the world wants me to succeed or live, when I try to make money and a living, it just gets destroyed.

F this, maybe I should just turn to total pr0ztitution.

Anyway, thanks for reading. Please call 988 if you're feeling depressed like me.

Happy Birthday Sister, I love you always!

Thank you.


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