Down to half dosing medication due to gambling lossing, I hate this country and economy.

I'm down to like taking only 1 instead of two painkillers because I can no longer afford because I just like lost $170 dollars earlier trying to make more freaking money, thanks a lot yaycasino and ace casino, y'all are just the worst! 

The went is due, it is like $6,300+ dollars, and my farther is living with his brother in his mansion and he doesn't want to give us any money.

I'm like making super risky money making strategies that I'm not even comfortable with, like gambling and Adult Industry type stuff just in hopes of getting through this freaking hell.

I felt like super bad after spending like all my money trying to make more money, especially since my mom needed medicine, but I hoped farther would pull through in the morning, but he didn't and now I feel even more bad.

I tried to turn my money into at least a little more money so that I can pay my surgery bill, amoung other bills, but in the end I lost it bloody all!

I feel like jumping from a high rise or something, but I can't do that over like $200, I've lost more freaking money before, so F that plan.

Please call or text 988 if you're experiencing symptoms of depression.

I thought to myself when I woke up, this is just Satan's plan, I need to follow it through and things will work out, or something like that.

I believe that Satan will pull through and I'll make even more money than I ever have.

And the thought of Satan looking over me makes me feel happy. My ears rang as I was writing this segment, definitely a good sign of Satan pulling through! ☆
Also, I like went to sleep after 7am, so the gambling and chasing losses definitely leads to sleep deprivation and crying and dreaming of gambling, such as earlier today. 
My life is hell, but it's happy hell.


Thanks for reading!


#ALT #EMO #transGIRL

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