Harming me knee

I went all out on my right legs and knee after attacking myself in anger towards myself earlier because my mom and bro were upset that our storage was going into actuation if we didn't pay about $300.

I felt extremely guilty because I had the money a few days ago but lost it trying to make more money, so I wanted to di3, so I hurt my knee and thigh at the very least.

I was l screamed this to myself, "why didn't you k1ll yourself!!!!" And I began to impulsively injury my already damaged knee.

My mom didn't want me to di3 and stuff, so she was like, Alan please don't k1ll yourself.

And she said that I was a beautiful person, so I appreciated that.

Also,

Before going into Walmart I screamed at myself.

My mom was like, take my hand, then she was saying to me that it wasn't my fault and stuff like that.

So, that was pretty touching.

Anyway, I'm at Publix now and both my knees hurt like hell.

Like I was telling my mom earlier, I'm in hell, how did I get in hell, I must have done something wrong.

My mom was like only the devil makes hell a bad place. We can get out of hell. You are my heaven.

Anyway, thanks for reading.

In the end we were able to pay until March, and my brother was able to sell my mom's jewelry for $100.

I feel so guilty, I absolutely would love to di3.
But, my family loves too much, I guess, and I lovd them, but I feel like I keep letting them down when trying to help.

Also, if y'all feel depressed like me, please call 988. Thank you.



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